Alicia Toner disappears tomorrow.
I thought I’d be a little sad to see her go but, in truth, all I feel is an excited itch that’s about to be scratched.
Tomorrow I’m launching a new creative project called “JOANIE”. If you follow me on social media, you’ll see “Alicia Toner” disappear and “JOANIE” take her place. She’s my new (to you) musical persona and while she is a bit of a character, I feel she is more authentically me than Alicia Toner has ever been. Being myself in music and in all my artistic practises has drained me. Alicia Toner is a consummate people pleaser, and no matter how much work I do to beat that out of myself, it’s my default setting. I second guess everything, I delete posts, I edit all my insane, weird quirks out of what I present to the world to the point where everything is a cloudy, diluted mess.
So it’s time for the people pleaser to step aside and make room for the one who knows herself, fully.
JOANIE is all the quiet parts of my brain said out loud. She sees the world a little differently and she’ll always tell you the truth about it. She is the person I’ve been getting to know for the past 5 years, and I have grown to love her. It’s ok if you don’t because she doesn’t need your validation. She’s not for everyone. I do hope you’ll vibe with her though. I feel like if you’ve enjoyed reading Autistic Traits, you will have a deep understanding of JOANIE.
This Substack will continue with the same content under a different name. Tomorrow it will change to “This is JOANIE”. I hope you’ll stay with me as I’ll still be speaking mostly to the late-diagnosed Autistic experience. Probably more-so. But it will also include some announcements about upcoming musical projects so if that’s not for you, I completely understand. Thanks for being on this journey with me as far as you have.
For the last time on the internet,
Alicia
Love this idea. I look forward to reading it. I’ve always loved your music but since you’ve come out as autistic, it give me more hope for myself. I am currently self-diagnosed late in life and seeking the official “stamp”. I watch you perform on stage I see myself. Thank you for being you. I really appreciate you.
Hey Joanie, felt the same way and did the same thing but I didn't remove all my work from Spotify I just started using Substack to see what I could do. One good thing is your mailing list is yours. Thats big so I hope you keep growing and sharing in this space. Feels good so far.🙏🏾